a moment on my soapbox

Soapbox time...you are forewarned....beware...

I have been thinking....we as a society do not give our children enough credit.

Having several family members in the education field, I have heard story after story of how parents are angered when their child is not chosen for a team or ranked in a competition or given equal playing time ...parents believe little Johnny's self-esteem will be harmed if he doesn't make the team or get the prize. So, our schools and organizations have swayed under the almighty pressure of the angry mob (maybe not to the extent of a mob, but I am on a roll here). All this does is tell our children that losing is just unacceptable, that doing their best is simply not enough - they need to be the best instead, and that they need to be good at everything. I just do not understand it...

Now, I know I sound a little harsh. I realize I am old school. But, I think a good, healthy "no" is good for a person every once in a while. A "sorry, you didn't make the team this year" shouldn't break a child's spirit (unless that spirit is shallow in its foundation). Granted, sadness will occur. Without a doubt, disappointments are hard to face at any age. But, disappointments will come for all of us. Why can we not realize that the "no" can be just as good for the child as the wanted experience...maybe even better for them. I simply do not want my children to be so unsure of their "uniqueness" that they are devastated when a "no" is given. I want them to dig down deep inside themselves and find the strength to plow through. I want my children to know that they are special and that they have God-given talents and skills. Our Father simply does not make us equipped to be good at everything. We try. We fail. We succeed. We excel. We fail again. Failure is not unacceptable ....not trying is. We all have had our journeys to find what we are gifted to do and what we aren't....I know I will NEVER be a mechanic or a geography teacher or a tennis pro...I would love to whack that ball across that court...but, well, not happening...I will survive...don't feel sorry for me...I have accepted my deficits..as sad as it is....

As I am watching my five year old son build a cabin with his lincoln logs, I notice he has an inate ability to create awesome structures with the most interesting stories behind them. God made him for a purpose...gave him talents /skills/ personality to meet the need. Now, when he tries something and doesn't succeed, this mama will give a hug, an encouraging word, remind him to try/try again, fill him with the truth that God made him unique, and then leave it at that. No protesting and no pleading to the director/coach from this lady. We will simply build that foundation a little stronger by praying...for God's purpose to reign...for the ones who did get "the part" to shine...and for my son to find his place where God wants him....We won't give up trying if it is on his heart to try...but, we will take every success and failure in stride knowing God has a purpose for both in life and a purpose for my son's response...as in everything, that purpose is to give God glory.

Now, I pray my soapbox doesn't fall in when that "no" is given. I pray the Mama Bear in me will slumber on. I pray my "cubs" know their Maker, know their purpose, and know their #1 fan is pulling for them...I pray that our journey as we try new things is the adventure that molds us into the people we are to be...I pray we take every yes and no with the grace that only He can give us...and learn the lessons that only He can teach.

Stepping down from my box now....